For anyone who isn't friends with me on my Facebook, I finally got the approval to work from home. I am really happy as I am sure you are all aware... we have had decent weather until this weekend... so, I was approved just in time before the winter started. I took this weekend to set everything up and verify it works properly. Down the road, I will be supplied the proper equipment from work, for now, I will make due with what I have... My friend is taking me over to the office some night this week so that I can retrieve my binders and personal items.
I changed my alarm clock right away, I am looking forward to an additional hour and a half of sleep... then I am making breakfast for Valentina. This has been the first weekend in a while that I have been so relaxed... I completed all the little projects I needed to do... in the past, I felt rushed trying to do everything I had to do and still get some downtime. I don't feel stressed about the long commute... once I got home on Friday, I realized how tense I was every morning and night... knowing I had the long trip. I suddenly felt at ease.
It's funny what I pushed myself to do, then when it changed, I realized through the transition that I was tense with having to force myself out daily. I also made plans with some friends to visit them... I know I will need to get out as people were concerned that with working at home I wouldn't get out. However; I think I will actually get out more and visit, hang with my friends.  I have actually felt cut off from my friends due to being exhausted by the time I got home from work.
I am sure I mentioned that I literally had a three hour plus commute per day, I am excited to have that time back to do more meaningful activities. I am considering joining the gym with the pool again, I would have time to enjoy it. I found I missed swimming after I spent the summer going to the lake with my friend.  I am thinking it will be a good way get back into exercising without putting too much stress on my knees and back.  
My mood changed drastically this past weekend, I am feeling like I have more opportunities opened to me. I also changed departments at work .. I am excited to be in a new position. It's nice to have a few good things happen to me all at once... I have hope that the transitions will put me on the path I've been working towards. I am even looking forward to the Christmas holidays, it has been a long time since I felt good about it... I've invited some people for dinner as noone should be alone this time of the year. 
I am going to purchace a bike this Spring, I have decided that this year is the one that I get back into living a healthy life. No more excuses, now that I have the time and means to achieve my goals... eventually I want to get back into walking, once I strengthen myself with swimming and biking. It's time for me to get back on the healthy track and do something for myself... Finally
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Someday I Will Know Why

Catching up has been a daunting task to say the least, I am hoping I didn't miss anyone... I follow a lot of blogs, I knew I did but it was still eye-opening.  It's been a busy week but really a good week, I sincerely missed being involved in the blogging world, it's like our own little family. Plus we are all open to meeting more people who are interested in being involved.  

This week I will be spending time getting my office completely organized, I purchased a huge cabinet so that I can get rid of all my smaller ones... It's quite the endeavor but it is going to be a great way of purging. I believe the more ready I am the easier the change will be, I really look forward to having time with Valentina and time for me to exercise. She even told me she wants it so that we can chat in the morning and have breakfast together...
I want to thank everyone for being so kind with your comments, part of my not wanting to write was because of the depression I am dealing with and not knowing how to be as  positive as I like to be when writing. I know we all have difficulties in life and it's not easy to have to read that someone is struggling, I am though... I am finding it a challenge to just get up, go to work and make it back home. Truthfully if it were not for my new friend, I often wonder if I would leave the house otherwise... Thankfully she is there to offer some outings that are good for me.

She has been the one who has come up with inexpensive ideas to make my home feel like a home because for eight years I kept thinking I was always going to move and I never truthfully settled here. Once I decided this is where I will be staying for years to come, she put up nice drapes, rearranged my kitchen to make it more open and comfortable... and found furniture for my office so that I will be set up for success to work from home... I feel like I am ready and I am grateful she has got me to that point.
I wanted to write with honesty here because although I am struggling ... I understand that many of us are dealing with overwhelming trials. Life isn't easy, nor do I expect that it should be. For with painful tests, they bring us experiences we might not aquire... It can take wisdom and years for us to see the benefits of any trial we may deal with... holding on until we can see the blessings from challenges is really all that we can do. I also am very aware that trying to have a good attidude will go a long way for me to handle the conflict given to me... 

Is it easy to always rise above controversy in our lives... no... but deep down I know it's worth it. I believe one day I will know and understand why I had to deal with something I felt I couldn't and maybe even be grateful... maybe. This is the reason that I keep putting one foot in front of the other... The knowledge and hope for the future...
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