Regret Is Nothing Without Change

Late last night I was laying in bed, I had heard something that was making me think about everything I have dealt with in the past few years.  How it had caused me not to trust myself... when I had to admit that it was because I didn't want to trust anyone else... I thought it would be easier... if I didn't allow myself to trust anyone, I couldn't be hurt right? I started thinking about what I would be remembered for... the girl who refused to trust anyone because she was afraid of being hurt... 

Do I really want to be remembered for that? Is that what I want ... people saying how sad it was that I refused to give life a chance again? I haven't been happy for a long time, I had to conclude it was because I was unwilling to trust again. I don't know that I am completely ready to go full speed ahead with trusting but I know I want to try... even though I have been hurt, disappointed and had my dreams broken... I don't want to live with this sadness anymore... 
I took a step today and joined a dating site, I may not find the great love of my life ... maybe it will be finding a good friend... I don't want to be closed off to trying anymore...  It's very true that I can be happy on my own and that is more likely what will happen ... I just don't want to live with regret... I think that is the saddest way to live life.

I might even be hurt again, that comes with trying... but what I realized is that I'm pretty sure I cannot be hurt as deeply as I was before and even though I am still not healed, I survived that... and I didn't think I could or would. So, it might be scary to really open myself up again but not trying would be more scary... This summer is going to be about facing some of my fears, the first one will be zip lining to work on conquering my fear of heights... the next is putting myself out there even if it means being hurt or rejected.
Also, I have to admit to myself that I had given up on myself in these past few months, it was easier than dealing with what was right in front of me. I have been comforting myself with food because of my fears and sadness... I wouldn't even confront how far I have strayed.... The only way to get back on the path I want to be is to accept the truth and make the necessary changes. I've decided that as soon as I'm working at home (which will be soon) I will be making my health a priority ...  

I am going to start with small steps and the first thing is being honest with myself, the second is making a plan and the third and most important is living that plan. I don't want to go back to where I was, I wasn't happy or healthy... I might have given up on myself but I don't have to stay there... I can make the changes I need to make... so that I don't live my life with regret... 
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88 comments :

  1. I'm glad you are in a better place. Let's see what happens. I hope good vibes come your way...and mine. We are both long overdue.

    Hugs to you xoxo

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  2. This is a really nice and very honest post Launna. It's really true regret is nothing without change. Regrets are there to remind us to change

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  3. A big, big yes! Regret will be useless if you don't change your ways anyway. It will still happen again and then it will be a toxic cycle.

    I wish you a wonderful week ahead, Launna. And healing from all the hurts you still have.

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  4. Food don't confort forever it is good that you are going to take steps. You will get what you want. Have a great day! xoxo

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  5. Temos realmente de viver na realidade sempre se superando
    a cada dia, sucesso amiga tenha uma semana abençoada.
    Blog:http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br/
    Canal:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmO8csZDARM

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  6. So true: regret is nothing without change!
    Such a lovely post Launna, so inspiring, thanks for sharing!
    Kisses, Paola.

    Expressyourself

    My Facebook

    My Instagram

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  7. It is one more great post by you Launna. Honestly, I believe that regret is not a way of getting over with whatever is holding us back. we need to change, for better.
    Hope you will like my blogs too, https://gbnavapara.blogspot.in/

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  8. Oh well done for joining a dating site, Launna. That's a great step. I think the key is to having about 2-3 people you can trust deeply in your life, that's it. You don't need anymore at all. I only have 2. Once you find the right person (you will know in your gut) then you will know if you want to trust them or not, or if you feel like you could. But I've found the true thing in relationships is loving yourself enough to not inflict your insecurities onto someone else and blame them for things they didn't do either. Go into it with a clean slate to avoid repeats of before. Take cues from them as well, mirror some of their actions and words initially and you will see if a bond is created.

    Raindrops of Sapphire

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  9. Hi sweet Launna,
    I agree with you. Your words are so adorable and I am very proud to follow your blog, because you inspire me every day.
    kisses
    Maggie
    Maggie Dallospedale Fashion diary - Fashion blog

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  10. Ohh how nice Launna that u took a step towards moving along n trusting ppl.. i am always confused between to trust or not and end up for the latter which is not good i know.. i hope i change it soon bcoz time is running and sometimes it may get too late.. as u rightly put u wud hv to trust ppl or life wont move ahead.. hv a great week ahead Launna ♥

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  11. How awesome that you joined a dating site. I really hope you have some positive experiences on there!! Date a few men and maybe you'll find yourself liking qualities that you hadn't before, or you'll click with someone who you never thought you would!! Happy dating and have fun!!

    Also, thank you for leaving the comment on my blog with your open willingness to reach out. So sweet of you!! ♥

    --
    Amber
    All the Cute 🎀
    Today's Post: Striped Chambray Dress

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  12. Dear Launna, I'll keep my fingers crossed for you, I hope your plan will be fulfilled. In the meantime I've started giving away all clothes I don't use any more... making a little space at home as you've just done...
    A big hug!

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  13. Oh..here's sending you positive vibes your way to have some summer fun. An Adventure. Think of smiling more. Cooking what you love and sharing some good memories of friendship along the way.

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  14. Sometimes we are just too hard on ourselves I think. Kudos to you for all the progress you're making. Just recognizing the problem and doing something about them is a win in my book. You'll get there slowly, but surely. Keep on keeping on, beautiful. :)
    Have a blessed week!

    missymayification.blogspot.co.uk

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  15. Good luck with your plan. I think you have a good handle on what to expect and have prepared yourself for different scenarios that can occur.

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  16. Good for you, Launna! You're making some very brave decisions and I applaude you for that. I also understand how difficult it could be trusting again after a real heartbreak. I think the wisest thing to do would exactly what you're planning to do: go out there again and meet new people but with certain caution. Of course, it's always easier said than done but I have faith in you and I know that if you're taking this step is because inside of you, you feel you're somewhat ready for it. Wishing you the best for that new adventure. <3

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  17. Good for you, Launna! I can tell you've been changing your way of thinking and I'm sure you will find happiness again. Good luck in the world of dating ;)

    Bella Pummarola

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  18. i am so happy to read that! Yes you are right Launna :)
    Lots of Hugs and kisses <3

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  19. Amiga Lau passando para ti deseja um dia abençoado
    Blog:http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br/
    Canal:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmO8csZDARM

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  20. I think your plan sounds very good.
    One step at a time is far more manageable and I am sure the rewards will come.

    It will be so good to start working from home, and not long until you start this!

    Hoping the week ahead is a good one for you - I'm sure it will be

    All the best Jan

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  21. I'm so proud of you dear Launna!
    Look at where you are now and think at where you were 1 or 2 years ago!
    You improved yourself so much, and I really think you worth all the happiness in the world!
    Good luck for everything dear! ;D
    xxx
    S
    http://s-fashion-avenue.blogspot.it

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  22. Hi Launna!
    Its crear that You are joining a website, even if it is just to meet new people :)
    I had a man when I was younger that lied to me several times but I trust 100% my actual partner. They are not all the same :)
    Happy week dear! Xxx
    www.travelera.es

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  23. I can completely relate to you, Launna, I too am the girl who refused to trust anyone because she was afraid of being hurt...

    I hope you don't live with regret, it eats you up and prevents you from living a fulfilled life. I hope you find a good friend on the dating site, and maybe even your soulmate.

    Sending much love xoxo

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  24. Dear Launna, I hope you soon meet someone special. As you say, one step at a time.

    Jasmine ♥♥♥

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  25. Ohhhh, good luck with the dating site adventure, Launna! To a life without regrets!

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  26. Way to get back out there. I'll pray some good people into your path. Life can be so lonely and we all need others. That's why some of us are online to begin with, eh? ;)

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  27. Yay, Launna! Awesome for you. Wishing you mega luck!

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  28. Loving your Summer plans! Last year I wanted to try zip lining at the Canadian national exhibition but was too afraid to go through with it. Maybe this year I might do it. You for signing up at a dating site. All the best dear Launna. I hope it gets better from here onwards. Hugs.
    www.effortlesslady.co

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  29. Amiga foco em tudo que for fazer
    Blog: http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br/
    Canal:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmO8csZDARM

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  30. Dear Launna,
    I'm trying to go to the gym regularly, it's in the same building where I work, so no excuses... I have also to eat well every day (not always, sorry... ) and I hope that you can see yourself as you are, a wonderful person...

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  31. Launna, Thank you so much for checking up on me. I know it's been a while but i should update soon. I'm glad you're finally getting out of your comfort zone and learning to "live" again. Love you

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  32. I applaud you for trying to put yourself out there even though you know the risks that takes a lot of courage. Please don't live with regrets.
    xoxox
    Beautetude

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  33. Trust is so hard to regain after being badly burned. It just takes the right person to unlock those fears. Hope everything works out well on the dating site---have fun and enjoy the moments!

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  34. Great blog lovely!You talk about a variety of different topics and I'm glad that I discovered it! I'm now following you on GFC #446. Please follow back so we can support eachother & keep in touch! xo from Italy,
    Sonia Verardo
    http://www.trenchcollection.com/

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  35. Launna great to know that you are moving ahead. Wish you loads of luck .. and you wont be hurt :)

    http://everythingthatclicks.blogspot.com

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  36. Dear Launna,
    I wish you a lovely weekend. On Sunday I'm taking kids to Toscana, to the sea hoping it will not rain too often...
    A big hug!

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  37. When you becomes conscious of what you must do, everything becomes easier, good job Launna and stay strong! a big hug.

    La Flò ♡ blog

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  38. Launna! Aquele pó bronzer é tão lindo! Tem uma tonalidade bonita e ao mesmo tempo sutil.

    Fico muito feliz em ler que você deu este passo do site de namoro! É importante, mesmo sendo devagar, você se permitir a tentar de novo. Aos poucos você vai conseguir fazer as mudanças necessárias para se sentir mais feliz!

    Ótimo sábado!

    Beijo! ^^

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  39. Good for you Launna. I'm actually excited for you and send positive vibes your way. I know you will not be letting your guard down anytime soon but you'll have fun and that too will happen in time. One little baby step after another and you will soon get to that place where you look back at your past hurt and think oh well. Amen! Have a lovely weekend beautiful.

    http://fashionablyidu.blogspot.com/

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  40. Very powerful post,I like this kind of posts!
    If you want that we follow each other,let me know! :*
    New post--> beautyshapes3.blogspot.hr

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  41. You are taking the right steps, Launna. Yes, they are baby steps and you might fall back to old self and pull back again but at least you are trying so give yourself credit for that. My husband and I met through online so there are some good men out there but you just have to carefully filter through the rotten ones. xx

    Shireen | Reflection of Sanity

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  42. My goodness, haven't we all felt this way at some point in our lives!! If we're honest, I think we all hit this stage more than once. I know I've experienced it, and I've chosen to be brave enough to open doors, open heart, open mind, and step back into the world of the living rather than waiting to live.

    I think you're doing so well, and that you're being self-loving and brave with the decision to try online dating! I hope that the experience is a positive one that brings smiles and self-esteem to your heart.

    Much love to you,

    - Dawn

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  43. Good for you! We've all been hurt before, and we've all been knocked down. The point is to get back up, and open up your heart again. Not loving, and not trusting isn't really living. Ya know? You go, girl!

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  44. Força, Foco e FÉ, postagem maravilhosa
    Blog:http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br/
    Canal:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmO8csZDARM

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  45. This is very true and, even though you don't know where it will lead, there's a lot to be said for giving it a chance. Even when you've completely given up on yourself, everything can turn around. I never would have believed that a year ago, but it happened in my life.

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  46. Do you hear me clapping for you and cheering you on? I think this is wonderful. I know after I was hurt by someone I had many trust issues. I built up a huge wall around myself for a few years. The wall helped me to build myself back up again, but then I realized I didn't know if I could ever trust anyone again. And then in talking to a friend I realized that that is part of life- the not knowing. If I didn't trust someone else and put myself out there I wouldn't really be any happier than if I didn't. Sounds like you have come to some good realizations. Wishing you all the best. :)
    ~Jess

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  47. Happy Sunday Launna! kisses and Hugs <3

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  48. Best wishes and all will be well. Hope this step is a great step towards a fulfilling life.

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  49. Good for you Launna....that you're opening your heart...willing to take a risk for what you want. It may work out or it may not but the thing is....you're going for it. Hugs.

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  50. Passando para ti desejar uma semana abençoada.
    Blog:http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br/
    Canal:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmO8csZDARM

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  51. Launna! E eu preciso aprender inglês para colocar legendas! hahaha! Bom, naquele vídeo eu apenas mostrei meus produtos terminados! ;)

    Ótima terça!

    Beijo! ^^

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  52. I'm in the middle of a ziplining post as we speak. I have so many pictures that I love, that it's hard to narrow them down (and narrow them down I must because I know not everyone will love one million pictures of my son ziplining like I do, hahaha).

    Good for you for moving forward. All we an do is take that one step forward. Nothing happens at all if we don't (I'm not talking about dating because I am HAPPILY as you know, that girl who isn't going to try again...but I've never been happier than I am single. Who knew!! I'm just talking about things in general. I've been learning to put that one foot in front of the other for a little over a year now Scary stuff sometimes. :)

    XOXO

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  53. So nice to hear from you Launna! I have been off blogging for a while and will need to catch up on your letters. I hope everything is well with you. ��
    Lesley

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  54. Wise words. It's great you are trying new things despite having some fears. Taking chances is always a great opportunity to grow and meet new people.

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  55. I love this post! When we get older, it's sometimes hard to get out there to try new things, but you've done it, girl and good for you! I wish you lots of fun and laughter! Hugs...RO

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  56. good point for reflexion. I suppose there are many times in our life to regret because we haven't made a change on it. Thanks for remembering!
    kss
    new post http://tupersonalshopperviajero.blogspot.com.es/2016/06/cosmetica-natural-cattier.html

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  57. I think you have to trust yourself to know what's good for you, and to know who to trust.

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  58. Ótima reflexão passando para ti desejar boa noite
    Blog:http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br/
    Canal:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmO8csZDARM

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  59. Have a lovely week Launna, I hope you are well and soon working from home and doing these changes, keep positive! :)
    xxx
    www.travelera.es

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  60. Launna, aquele hidratante de banho foi uma decepção pra mim... O aroma é bem ruim! Não vou comprar de novo.

    Ótima quinta!

    Beijo! ^^

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  61. Sounds like you are already making some positive steps in the right direction. I hope you definitely find a good friend in the dating site. And don't put off your health too long ;-)

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  62. You have done this before you can do it again! You are very strong and very determined. You will succeed! Just remember to not beat yourself up too much when you slip! No one will be harder on you than you!

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  63. You have a solid plan, love the steps you are setting for yourself. I think it will make a good change to have those goals to guide you. Congrats Launna!

    xx,
    Tania
    http://inspiremyfancy.blogspot.com/

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  64. It feels like you write my heart and life out. I just made this promise to myself to take care and make changes in life for me as I am in a situation where I know that the person who live with me isn't going to take care of me. So I decided to take care of myself for me for my parents for all those who love me. Hope you are doing well my love. <3

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  65. Good for you for joining the site! I hope that it brings you happiness!!
    www.amemoryofus.com

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  66. Hello,

    Very informative and interesting post.

    Change is the only permanent thing in life. If we refuse to change we will find it difficult to cope with life. If we see around us everything is changing and adapting to the prevailing conditions and moving on with confidence and courage and without looking back with remorse or regrets. Life moves forward with changes and with change comes happiness and contentment.

    Best wishes

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  67. so happy to read that bold move you made.I hope you find happiness dear
    Wish you all the best

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  68. Have a lovely weekend Launna. I hope you are doing great.

    http://fashionablyidu.blogspot.com/

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  69. Very true Launna, you don't have to stay down after you've fallen. I'm so glad you're now putting yourself out there, I say, just do it! Life is to be lived to the fullest and if you can't really live if you're scared of what could happen, be expectant! And if the expected turns out not quite like you thought, you move! You deserve to be happy Launna, I really pray your life is filled with love, laughter, joy and happiness. Please take a chance- you might get hurt but keep it moving. Love you loads Launna. Xx.

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  70. I find that being honest with oneself is one of the most cathartic things that we can ever do...lovely post, my friend :)

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  71. yea yes and yes Launna. Go for what you want. Do the things that play in your heart. Do sit by the side longing for something out of your control but go after what is in your power. Words for me too. Hugs.

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  72. Postagem ótima amei
    Blog: http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br/
    Canal:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmO8csZDARM

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  73. Hi dear Launna! How are you? I hope that you are fine! I love the way you think and you are so true.. Regret will be useless if you don't change.

    Have a wonderful sunday!

    xoxo
    www.its-dash.com

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  74. Hi Launna, Baby steps are good and I have friends joining dating sites with an open mind so as not to give stress to themselves. They enjoyed making more friends and seeing who clicked than immersing in those sites for dating per se. Take time and take baby steps.

    Jo
    Jo's Jumbled Jardinière

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  75. That's brilliant news that you joined a dating site Launna, and you're going to be conquering some of the things that scare you over the summer. Putting ourselves out there is never an easy thing to do, as it can feel risky and is a step into the unknown. But it's important to given everyone a fair chance, and not assume all men are insincere. It's also a valuable chance to come in contact with a wider range of people, and show yourself that you are capable of taking this next step.

    Wishing you luck and a few adventures along the way!

    Saba xx

    www.trulymadlydeeplyfashion.blogspot.com

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