Being Kind To Myself

I have been thinking a lot about how I have been feeling about myself lately... I know I have been harder on myself than I would ever be on anyone else, I think I expect too much of myself and I don't cut myself a break because I sometimes believe I have too many excuses. I haven't wanted to use justification so that I have a reason not to change. However; these past two weeks have shown me that I am not rationalizing anything... I'm honestly in a great deal of pain. Walking more than a few blocks have become intolerable, just standing up is an effort... I have kept thinking this will pass so that I can get back on track.
I took an additional two days of vacation off with my weekend, I really needed the time off from work to think and relax  ... While I was off, I tried to do a little shopping and I finally had to admit to myself that this is worse than what I had been admitting to myself, there's something more going on that I need to take the time to find out, it's not normal to have this much pain. When I get back to work tomorrow, I will be looking to take a vacation day next week or the one after where I can make an appointment with my doctor. 
The good thing is my friend and I are planning on joining the Canada Games Center this month, swimming will be about the only thing I can deal with right now as I don't need any added stress on my joints. Once I join, I plan to go there 3-4 times per week, I would love to say more but I don't want to push it... I can always add to it later. Also, my friend loves to swim in the lakes once the water is warm enough, so we definitely plan on doing that often this summer. Until I find out what is going on with me physically I am not going to overdue it with anything. I'll probably have to see a physiotherapist... I am hopeful I can turn this around. 
Also, Valentina saw the orthodontist and we have two options, one that we are leaning towards but we are waiting until the dentist receives the file, then we can make an informed decision. The good thing is that either method will fix the issue she is having, which I am grateful for... I know how important it is to have nice and healthy teeth, it makes such a difference with your self-esteem. Since I grew up with less than stellar looking teeth due to the fire I survived, I want different for my children if at all possible. 
I have been reading a great deal blogs over the past two weeks and quite a few of them involved learning to accept and love ourselves for who we are... and not putting ourselves down if we fail from time to time. If we are afraid to fail, we will never succeed. If I slip up it doesn't mean I am weak and unlovable, it means I just need to find a different way to succeed. There will be a way, it will just take time to figure out ... Admitting there is a physical issue is the first thing I need to do so that I can find out what is happening and then I can find what will work for me. 

Spring is just around the corner, we have been pretty lucky with the winter here this year which I have been really grateful for... it has been a blessing that I have not had to go out in it daily... with how I feel I don't know that I could have dealt with the commute much longer. I'm not going to be disappointed with myself, this isn't something I can just talk myself into... it's the same with depression when someone feels like this, they can't just tell themselves to get up and do things... they need to get help. The answer is that I need to be kinder to myself, the way I am with others...
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  1. Launna, I totally comprehend! I am also quite hard on myself and am trying not to be. It is something I have been working on and needing to retrain myself. And the image with the domestic cat and the lion with the quotation...this is exactly what I have in my profile! It hopefully reminds myself and others that it is so important how we view ourselves. Sending you much love and many hugs.

    1. Yeah.. I totally agree. How we view ourselcesourselves is very very important..

      Have a painfree week Launna

  2. Dear Launna, I hope you get relieved of that pain very soon. And always be kind to yourself.

    Jasmine x

  3. So true my dear Launna: you needto be kinder to yourself!
    Stay strong babe and swimming sounds like a great idea!
    I can't wait for spring, it will be inspiring...
    Have a lovely day,
    Kisses, Paola.

  4. Why is that, Launna? Why are we so hard on ourselves? I, too, am so much harder and un-accepting of myself than I am of anyone else. I expect a perfection from myself that I would never expect of others.

    I hope the swimming helps you. I, too, at one point had so much pain I could hardly get a deep breath. They tried all sorts of tests to figure out what was going on. They finally decided I had(have) 'reactive arthritis'--it does not affect the bones or structure but it acts on the muscles and tendons. It was like having tendinitis in my whole body...mostly ankles, hips, back. I was on an anti-inflammatory for well over a year but it finally worked and I went into a 'remission'. Since then (20 years ago)-I have had 3 minor 'flares'. As soon as I feel one coming on I get on something and it has never gotten out of control like it did that first time.

    I hope they can figure out what your problem is quickly so you can get treated for whatever it is. God bless you, Launna. Love you to the moon, girlie! xo diana

  5. Being kind to oneself is essential. I think swimming is a great idea. I wish there was a pool close by that we could use. The closest one to us is about 20 miles away.

  6. Launna, I'm so sorry you're in so much pain. I'm glad you're going to the doctor soon, as chronic pain makes it hard to focus on anything else. I posted a picture on my Facebook page today that I think you would like, and it applies to all of us to realize that no matter what, we are enough. I'm sending you positive thoughts and vibes that you are feeling better soon.

  7. Launna, I hope you get the help you need soon so that you can stop being in pain. Yes, please be kind to yourself. I agree that this pain isn't going to just go away on its own. Take care. Hugs to you.

  8. My sweet Launna,
    I understand you and I thank that you need yo be kinder yo yourself. This is very important. I love swiming and I think this is an amazing idea.
    Have you an adorable day and please... remember that you are a very special person
    Maggie Dallospedale Fashion diary - Fashion blog

  9. Hope the Doctor will help you against the Pain! Big Hugs Launna! <3

  10. oh gosh you shouldn't be in that much pain....I'm glad you will see your doctor. Water is such a good thing and I'm glad you are getting involved. It will be easy on your joints. I hope you start feeling better...I hope the doctor doesn't find anything major.

    Glad all is working out on the orthodontics's important.

    Yes, kindness to yourself is important, even when you feel like crap. it is so very true that you can't self-talk your way out of depression- you just have to get help and get through it. I see it as an internal chronic pain thing- sometimes it flares up and there's really nothing you can do about it except endure until it passes...even with help. Being kind to yourself won't make it go away but it also will help a bit, and it certainly won't make it worse.

    Hugs!! xoxo

  11. Estou encantada com aquele iluminador! ;)

    O melhor é ir voltando aos poucos na caminhada. Assim você não força tanto o corpo! Mas se você estiver sentindo muita dor, o certo é você realmente se consultar com um médico. Um profissional vai saber te auxiliar da maneira correta! Se cuida, Launna! Se não eu vou ficar preocupada...

    Ótima quinta!

    Beijo! ^^

  12. Hay Launna!!!

    Happy international women's week! :D sending a big hug! :)


  13. Que maximo amei arrasou na postagem, obrigado pela visita.

  14. It is wonderful that you are making plans with friends and getting out to do fun things.. that is absolutely essential for emotional and spiritual health!!! Glad to see you blogging more sweetie, always love reading your posts... -

  15. Hi Launna, it feels great to be here again!
    This post is a big deal to me because I'm in such a need of being kind to myself, I've been pushing myself so hard and punishing me when not able to finish things in the time I planned, this got me feeling sick and I took a break that made me feel so great and so much more ready to fight back again, I guess I was getting mentally exausted of university, and now I have more things to catch up to but my mind feels at ease.
    Swimming is a great idea, I'm visiting my father more since his house has a pool and we've been swimming and it feels great, I dont really feel like it is much of a exercise so I added dance to my routine too. But I think its enought for you who are in pain, dont push too hard.
    It great to know everything is going smooth to Valentina, and I would suggest you some bodypositivity accounts on instagram, it helps to love myself so much more and I feel further away from depression thanks to them.
    I realised I have some reverse body dysmorphia and that makes me worry so much because since I'm not seeing myself as I am, I'm always thinking "how bad must I really be?" and when people look at me I'm wondering all the bad thing there are going in their heads... It sucks.
    Hope you have a blessed weekend! Tomorrow I have a presentantion on university, wish me luck (YN)
    See ya, xoxo :*

  16. Hello!
    First I'm really sorry I haven't visit your blog in such a long time. My whole life is kinda a mess right now, since I really lost a track of where I'm going and what I want, so I took a two month brake and just distanced myself from everything, or at least most of it. It was slightly useless and waste of time, but on the other hand I had really refreshing time with some amazing people, so I'm defenitely not regreating it.
    I'm sorry to read you're not doing so well. Hope swimming will help you. I know the lady who is very not a sport type, but she loves swimming and finds it very relaxing, it's nice how free we can feel in a water.
    I'm glad that winter is over as well, it never gets to cold in London, although we saw some snowflakes falling this year. But my next project will take place on the beautiful Croatian island, and I'm really looking forward to it, especially if weather will be pleasant.
    I wish you all the best, and don't be to hard on yourself. I agree we need to push overselves even to pleasant and beneffical things sometimes, but it's also important to take some time and just enjoy it as it is, at least to take our minds away from some problems.
    Enjoy first spring days, kisses, Danny

  17. OK..I started typing something and it disappeared. Dang...I'm glad to hear you are moving on. The swimming sounds wonderful. I hope you can be good to yourself and find the right things that might improve being pain-free. Stay positive. Always easier said than done.

  18. OMG... wish I could make the pain go away soon..

    Truly, we need to be kinder to ourselves..
    Do take the time off, be good to yourself and let the pain fade away!

  19. I am glad you are going to take a day next week to go to the doctor. If you are feeling like you are in more pain than is normal then that is a great idea!

    I also love swimming. It is so much better for the joints. I am glad you have a swimming buddy, as it is easier to stay motivated with a friend.

    I have been working on being nicer to myself too. I say things to myself that I would never say to anyone else. Not sure why we are so hard on ourselves! I try to stop and change what I say inside my head now to what I would say to a friend. It is getting better- but I think I need more practice. :)

    Wishing you a happy and relaxing weekend!

  20. Spring always seems to perk up one's mood. Must be all the pretty flowers and warmer weather.

  21. I'm so sorry to hear you're dealing with so much pain, dear Launna!
    Definitely to go to see doctor is the best decision, but please, try to be nicer with you, dear!
    Maybe your pain is, in part, a signal that you're pushing yourself too much, so slow down, try to find a softer rithm for everything in your day.ùThis is doesn't mean you have to drop with your goals, definitely you never shouldn't, but take time to make your body and mind get ready for that rithm!
    It's like a training: you cannot run a marathon if you before can't walk for 10 km, isn't it?
    Try to follow the sporting rules: work on it every day at your best, not more!
    Anyway I think that swimming will bring you great help, phisically and mentally and you'll see, slowly the sitution will change, just have a little patience! :)

  22. Have a lovely weekend Launna and... stay strong!
    Kisses, Paola.

  23. Dear Launna,:( , I'm truly sorry to know that you've been having these troubles, I can only imagine what the pain you describe would feel. I'm glad to know that you've taken a proactive decision to have it checked out. Pls do as soon as you can. Valentina is blessed to have an angel as a mom and I'm glad that she will get her teeth fixed- can't wait to read what amazing things that does for her self esteem.

    I pray going swimming opens up a new mode of keeping fit which is just as efficient as walking. I'm truly rooting for you all the way. I'm so sorry I haven't been here in ages, I'm just in that head space where a lot is happening off blogosphere for me and I've missed so many blog posts from bloggers I love but, it's life, isn't it?

  24. i agree each bit of your wonderful piece of writing dear Launna .
    i am feeling sorry for pain but i am uplifted by your positive spirit that will definitely help you to get out from it soon.
    wishing your daughter and you a perfect healthy life dear friend!
    hope you will be able to feel better with your choice as swimming is a complete exercise for body and mind and therapy as well.
    in winters i too face joints pain specially when i eat rice mostly but if i quit rice even for a week i feel better .
    Hugs and prays for you .

  25. Dearest Launna, I'm sorry to hear about the pain you've been experiencing, which has affected your daily activities and errands. Yes, please do see a doctor at the earliest opportunity, as your health needs to be the top priority. Hopefully you can decide on the right treatment and get a good routine in place, which will support your recovery.

    What you said is very true. We're often much more critical and harsh with ourselves, than we would be with others. It's not helpful to punish yourself or be overly critical. The most helpful thing, as you pointed out, is to be kinder to yourself and find alternative ways of succeeding in your goals.

    I hope you feel better very soon and have a positive week ahead.

    Lots of love Saba xx

  26. As much as most of us like to hope that medical issues will "go away by themselves," a wise person knows when it's time to seek help. I haven't always been wise regarding that issue, and I very nearly paid a dear price. I'm glad you're planning to go to the doctor. Smart lady!

    Yes, be kind to yourself and love yourself. You're lovable, even if some people may have treated you otherwise. Embrace yourself... who you were, and who you are. And swim! (Great therapy!)

  27. True. We sometimes know we have to take action but we hesitate. All the best Launna!

  28. As women, we always do too much for others, while we get sick, or lose ourselves. Once we gather our courage to recognize that we deserve the best, or that we can get back up if we fall to be successful, a light goes off because we know we can do it. Being with friends who support us is always so wonderful, but many of us may not have that. I'm happy that you going to do some things that you love with a good friend and that you'll check on your health. The people in your life need you to be around, pain-free. Hugs...

  29. There is definitely something in the air this year as most of the bloggers whom I follow whether fashion, beauty or lifestyle have been promoting self love and being more conscious about what we do with out life. I honestly love the positivity that has been going around, the world that we live in definitely needs it. And I am glad that it also opens up your heart to be less harsh towards yourself. Hugs. xx

    Shireen | Reflection of Sanity

  30. Launna! Eu curti muito aqueles dois itens. Foi muito legal conhecer novos produtos! ;)

    Ótima segunda!

    Beijo! ^^

  31. Hi dear Launna!

    It is so important that you have to be kind to yourself! That is really important!

    Keep up Launna!


  32. Hi dear Launna,
    Have an adorable day
    Maggie Dallospedale

  33. We know our bodies best and it you feel like the pain is abnormal then its most def time to go in and be seen. My right shoulder has been hurting and everyday i hope the pain goes away. After 2 weeks I went in and thankfully it's nothing that exercise can't fix. I'm happy Valentina is close to getting her dental needs taken care of. That sure does wonders for one's self esteem. Have a great week ahead Launna and do take good care of yourself.

  34. We are definately our own worst critics! Have a great week!

  35. Sorry to hear that you are in so much pain, have you been in the doctors now? I hope it is over soon as you need to be able to walk, you wanted to do exercise so you need this walking and even more now that Spring is coming and the walks are always prettier :)
    Many of my patients are now having test for Vit D deficiency as after not very sunny winters and if they do not go out too much anyway, they have this deficit of the sun vitamin and they get a lot of bone pain and lack of Energy, you may want to check it for Vit D too...
    I hope you feel better soon dear Launna
    Have a lovely week

  36. Dear, I am so glad to know you are making time to be with friends and for doing things that will bring you joy and comfort. I pray for you today that you start feeling better as soon as possible and get rid of that nagging pain immediately and forever.
    Stay strong Dear and remember it's just the hard time, and that will pass soon.
    I have been feeling so dull and sad lately (due to some personal things), but I am blessed to have friends and many inspirations like you around me. Stay constantly reminds me: "I am not alone. I cannot be weak or give up after coming this far in life, that my good days are ahead where I will see my dream turning into a reality." So sending those positive vibes to you today.
    May you feel motivated and your Best Self soon!!

  37. I'm so sorry to read you are experiencing so much pain ... definitely best to look further into this.

    Pleased that things are progressing well with the orthodontist and that you and your daughter will be able to make an informed decision soon.

    Do please take care of yourself

    All the best Jan

  38. Hi Launna!

    Unfortunately, I think we ALL can be a little too hard on ourselves sometimes. I know I can be. I've been trying to change that recently but I'll admit, it's not the easiest thing to do. I know you can do it though! <3 I'm glad you're looking into your health. It can be a scary thing but if something is wrong, it's better to find out what it is and fix it before it gets worse. I'm always here if you want to talk! :) Stay warm!!

    xo, Sarah
    Hustla, baby.

  39. Always a good idea to be kind to ourselves, we can often be our own harshest critic sometimes! I hope you can get to the doctor for your pain, life is so much harder when there is something wrong with our bodies as it makes even normal things more of a struggle!

    Fingers crossed it's a simple and quick fix to get you back to being pain-free!

    Away From The Blue Blog

  40. I hear you about physical setbacks! We rarely acknowledge how deeply those affect us on a subconscious/emotional level. They really do have a powerful influence, and I'm glad you took some time to process. Here's to being gentle with ourselves and celebrating what we do accomplish rather than what we don't!

  41. Launna! Aquela marca que mostrei é nova pra mim. Acho que chegou há pouco tempo aqui no Brasil!

    Ótima quarta!

    Beijo! ^^

  42. Yes, setbacks do just that. Wishing you well, Launna. Have a nice day.

  43. hi Launna, you shouldn't be so hard with yourself. Things sometimes take time. Nobody can be 100 percent active in all areas of their life- all the time. Sometimes we need to concentrate on one thing, sometimes on other... It is all part of life. We shouldn't tear apart ourselves for something that just means being human.

    Swimming....I'm a big fan of swimming. Too bad I don't have that option anymore. I miss living by the sea (not to mention near an Olympic pool). The city I live in now doesn't have a proper pool. There are only hotels pools, but what they charge is crazy. Anyway, swimming is a great activity when we have any kind of joint, knee or back problems. It is the only sport where injures are highly unlikely.

    Scheduling an appointment with doctor to figure out why you're experiencing chronic pain is a wise thing to do. When something hurts all the time, it is something that needs to be looked closer into...often our body uses pain to let us know something is wrong, pain can often be a signal from the body.

    I'm glad to hear your daughter is fixing up her dental issues....Having a health smile does add to our self-esteem.

  44. Dear Launna,

    I'm glad you're realizing how important is to love oneself. Life is hard sometimes and our value as a person shouldn´t depend on how 'perfect' we are.

    Kss a lot
    New post in my Lifestyle Blog

  45. I can relate to that. I am my biggest critic.
    I hope you treat yourself with kindness more too, Launna.

    Enjoy spring!

  46. Hey Beautiful lady, you are incredibly important. Sure life can be a pain but it always has some amazing things in it. Have an amazing day out there. You deserve the fun, the beautiful, the joy.

  47. Launna, this post is amazing and I feel so happy to see what you've accomplished!
    We are always so hard with ourselves and we take every little thing too serious, we need to enjoy life, the little things, dedicate time to ourselves and appreciate all the good things we have!
    Wish you a lovely day

  48. I'm sorry you're in so much pain at the moment, that's horrible. I feel for you. Joining the centre sounds great though to do swimming, I really hope it helps you and you begin to feel more positive. It's hard not to put ourselves down when we feel like we failed, I do it all the time, but the important thing is to look at how far we have come and see what we have achieved and that should encourage us to move forward. Hopefully the fees for the orthodontist wont be huge, but you're right, nice teeth are really important. I was meant to have braces as I have crowded wonky top teeth, but I never did and I regret it sometimes because they're not straight.

    Raindrops of Sapphire

  49. Lau querida uma ótima postagem, obrigado pela visita.

  50. I think you've taught us the most beautiful and important lessons. Thank you Launna.
    Being kind to oneself is extremely important, yet difficult. So glad to see you doing so well.
    sending you all my love.


  51. I'm so sorry to hear about your struggles at the moment. We are always so tough on ourselves too. I love the picture of the lion and cat, whenever I see it I find it impacting. Wonderful to hear about swimming, that'll be so positive!

  52. Launna! Então, infelizmente aquele tônico que mostrei não deu certo. Fiquei decepcionada, porque aquele item não ajudou em nada na oleosidade do meu cabelo!

    Ótimo domingo!

    Beijo! ^^


I love and appreciate all genuine comments, to save a little time, I won't be commenting on the comments on my blog (unless you don't have a blog), I will just visit your blog and comment there, if you have left a meaningful comment for me... I would much rather spend the time reading and commenting on a few extra blogs ❤