As I reflect on this last year of my life, I am reminded that I have the same goal as I did last year. That could mean one of two things, either I am persistent and when I want something, I don't stop until I attain it or two I am too stubborn to give up. If it's the second, I am hoping my stubbornness does not bring me more of what it has in the past. I am hopeful that for once it helps me to have what I want and need.
All and all it has been a pretty good year, certainly it could have been better. I am just grateful that it was a year that I really progressed in my life. Work has been better, a lot more relaxing, which is what I needed... less stress in that department. I have not felt the need be completely alone which has made my being a mama even better. I am totally blessed to have Valentina, she has been and continues to be a joy to raise. I truly love both of my daughters very much.
This year I actually let me guard down and allowed myself to feel, sometimes with exhilarating results, other times.. not so fantastic. I have to admit that most of the time taking a chance has been pretty damn wonderful. The fall from being up do high does hurt and feels a lot more painful than it used to be. Somehow, I still think it will be worth it, I just feel that life without excitement isn't even a life worth living, that is just existing.
I am enjoy Christmas and I plan to just cook, bake, play with Valentina and talk with my friends. For New Years I want the same wish that I had last year, this year it seems a lot more attainable than it did last year. That leaves me feeling excited, I just want to enjoy my life and have fun. I want to take chances and I want to do things I have never done before. I just want to live my best life, be the best me that there is.