Is Silence Golden?

The only thing that matters now is my mission, nothing will stand in my way anymore.

I have been wanting to write all weekend but my mind wouldn't settle long enough to get the thoughts out... I would start a blog post and half way through I would be writing about a completely different thought.  So I scrapped those two and decided it would be best to just get to bed early, I ended up waking up at 3:30 am and basically I have been up ever since.  Which has left me a great deal of time to just think about things, some things are hard to let myself think about so I tend to do whatever I can not to ...
I did let myself think about it this morning and I came to a realization that I am lost right now, I don't seem to have a direction, I am going in so many ways that I now understand why I can't sleep.  I am not settled with anything right now, everything is up in the air.  I have to move by no later than June, it has not been easy to find a place where I want at the price I want.... I have to figure out something soon though, I can't and don't want to stay here after June.  My work is even chaotic right now, a lot of changes happening that means I have to make drastic changes to stay with them... more training, more knowledge.  Which I sometimes feel I am out of the loop there at times.

Since I am not sure where I will be living, I may have to think out of area which would be changing Valentina's school, I think that would be really hard on her, she will be eleven this spring. That is weighing on my mind, I want to do the best for Valentina and I think keeping her with her friends is the best option, if at all possible. Also with work, it could mean changing positions which could be different hours, like I said, lots of changes for me in the near future.
Plus I have unresolved issues that I am still trying to work out, those tend to be harder than the other issues combined.  I mean, I know I will find a place and move by June, I know I will figure things out at work and move up.  I don't know the answers to my unresolved issues, there isn't an answer that I can come up with, I have tried to work it out to no avail. I wonder if sometimes there is no answer?  That frustrates me, I am the kind of girl who wants answers, explanations, discussions, I don't do well with silence.

I am still losing weight but slower which is fine, I need to get more committed to the gym again, which means less time for writing.  It's a good healthy trade off to be able to get to my goal, I am really excited about that.  It has been a long time since I have been excited about anything, I would like to take this excitement into other parts of my life.  I went out on a date, really nice guy, friendly, respectful but there was nothing there for me.  At least I am trying, I am sure I will meet someone else soon, I am just taking my time and waiting for the right one.

115 comments :

  1. It seems like you've just hit a point in your life where change is forcing itself on you, which may not be a bad thing. Sometimes it's hard to accept or make change until you have no other choice.
    Best of luck with finding someplace to live, your job changes, and your unresolved issue.

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    1. Thank you Jaimie, I think if I could fix my unresolved issue... that would fix a lot of other things... :-/

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  2. I hope you get things figured out soon.
    It is so difficult when you don't know where you are going. You deserve so much and I keep praying that things are going to just start falling into place for you.

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    1. Awe thank you Betty, you are always sweet to me, I really appreciate it:)

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  3. You are so strong Launna. I know that you will accomplish all that you set out to do and more. Be as kind and supportive to yourself as you are to others. Perhaps if you concentrate on the concrete tasks of learning the new material at work and looking for a new home for you and Valentina, the unresolved issue will sort itself out while you aren't looking. I believe in you.

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    1. Thank you my Cindy, I do really think if I could resolve that issue, other things would fall into place much quicker... I will have to do it backwards for now..

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  4. Launna all I can honestly say is go with the flow. If you are meant to have these changes let them happen and let God handle it for you.

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    1. Thank you for your kind comment Rae, I know... I just have to go with the changes...

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  5. Change can be good, dear. You're a strong person and I know you'll figure it out. :)

    xx,
    J
    www.jonnessa.blogspot.com

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  6. Great post and great quotes, changes aren't always bad, good luck pretty.
    Followed on gfc, hope you do the same.
    Kisses.
    thelittlelennon.blogspot.com.es

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    1. Thank you Ines, I will visit your blog and follow you too :)

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  7. Well at least you had a GOOD date. As for the other stuff, the best advice someone gave me one time was to solve the easiest problem first. The less you have to think about the less overwhelming the biggest problem will seem. I know flinging a place is not the easiest thing but worry about getting that done and don't worry about the if ands and buts about changing schools until it's a reality.

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    1. Thank you Kenya, I am trying to take one thing at a time... hopefully everything comes together...

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  8. Do a vision board. It's a thick piece of poster board onto which you paste pictures of the things you want in your life. Look through magazines or on the web and find photographs of the place you want for you and your daughter.
    The tables, windows, etc. Do the with your work. Find a picture of someone doing what you want to do in the next phase of your life.
    You can't hit what you can't see. Vision boards work for me.
    R

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    1. Thank you Rick, I live vision boards, I have one on my blog. I have been thinking of doing a board here that I can change up easily :)

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  9. Hi there. Dont give up! I know the feeling of being lost. Somehow you will figure everything out.
    hugs from New York,
    xx
    Ask Erena
    http://askerena.blogspot.com/

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Erena... I am trying not to give up...

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  10. Launna! Thank you so much for your caring and stopped to check on me, my husband been off from work, and working on my blog also posted for me too. I only do the comment! I am finally back to normal. I hope you are doing wonderful too.

    http://www.attraction2fashion.com

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    1. Awe thank you Tanya, I am so glad you are finally feeling better :)

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  11. Excellent post.. I loved the first quote
    Happy Monday
    Kisses
    www.beingbeautifulandpretty.com

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    1. Thank you so much Pooja... Happy Monday to you too :)

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  12. Morning my dear!
    I think that change can be good...... best of luck Launna!!!!!
    You are so strong.... I know it!

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    1. Thank you so much Paola, I hope I am as strong as people think I am... :-/

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  13. Wish you the best for your Decisions ,hope things going great for you! Waiting for the right one sounds good ,love is importend for a great relationship <3

    kisses

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    1. Thank you Love T. ... I hope I can find someone to love again... I don't know though... I still love him SO much :-/ (even though he's not mine to love anymore:'(

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  14. I hope that things turn out great for you! I find change the most difficult challenge ever but we always get used to things again!

    I hope you feel better soon!

    www.stylememoirs.co.uk

    xxx

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  15. Silence is golden

    http://www.facebook.com/AmandaChicFashionRoomLounge?ref=hl
    twitter & instagram : @fashionrlounge
    Fashion room lounge

    A chic kiss ;)

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    Replies
    1. Thank you Amanda, silence is harder for me to deal with... I'd rather deal with the issue then gave silence :'(

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  16. Thank you Alissa, I will certainly visit and follow you ;-)

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  17. I love your blog its unique, sometimes change is great. Things will work out for you dear. Kisses from KENYA? P.s we follow you.

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  18. If change is for good then its Good :)
    Thank you for your lovely comment on my blog.

    join now -
    Win a product worth 20$ from Dresslily.com with free shipping. !!

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  19. Thank you Shopping, I will visit and follow ;-)

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  20. Replies
    1. Thank you so much what Kenny Hearts... you are so sweet ;-)

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  21. Uncertainty can be a huge stress-inducer, if you let it. Don't let it. Have faith that things will work out.

    And if it's necessary for your daughter to change schools, she'll adapt. YOU are the most important constant in her life.

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    1. Thank Susan... uncertainty isn't always bad... it just never seems easy :-)

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  22. Good luck to you with your changes. My sister-in-law just went through some really big changes all at once, and they were to the point of being overwhelming at the time...they really stressed her out, one included moving. She has had THE best most wonderful changes take place though, as a direct result. I wish that for you too! Change can be very good!

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    1. Thank you Rosey... whenever you throw moving in the mix... it makes it stressful... :-/ ... I'm glad it went so well for your sister in law ;-)

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  23. I hope you can get things resolved concerning a place to move to and your job and all. You have been through so many changes in the recent past. Sometimes it just takes time for everything to fall into place.

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    1. Thank you Daisy... I am hoping everything will fall into place as it is meant to be... I just have to be patient :)

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  24. Thank You Alissa, I will keep in contact :)

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  25. LOVE UR BLOG HUN! keep it up
    would you like to follow each other?
    following you now

    http://iamaleena.blogspot.com.au/

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  26. Too much flux. Stay on with your goals. Life finds a way to resolve most issues.

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    1. Thank you Rajesh, that is sound advise.. unfortunately the heart gets involved from time to time....

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  27. Your article is always awesome and heart winning.
    I hope GOD will bless you for the best. Good Luck.

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  28. Loads of kisses and love my friend <3
    Carolina

    www.the-world-c.blogspot.com

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    Replies
    1. Thank you Carolina, loads of kisses and love to you too :) xox

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  29. Have a fab day doll!!!
    A lot of kisses!!!!!

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  30. Hi Launna, amazingly truly quotes!

    Have a happy and productive week
    http://lavenderloafers.com

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  31. well i think that sometimes it is better to be silent, because the right words (or the truth) can hurt somebody more deeply than physical injuries.

    thank you for your comments.

    x
    dahi

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    1. You might be right DK... the only problem is I am the one living with the silence and sometimes that's pretty painful.... :-/

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  32. I hope you figure out what's causing you not to sleep at night, and work out the unresolved issues, if anything time sometimes will work it out too, and yeaaah I need to start committing to the gym again too!

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    1. Thank you Pop.. I may have this figured out soon... although the unresolved issue breaks my heart over and over :'(

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  33. You are a very strong woman that has been through a lot I am sure things will figure itself out and you will get backon track...

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    1. Thank you Steffy... I hope I'm strong enough to deal with the changes coming ... :-/

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  34. Hi sweet Launna! I can't seem to express all my thoughts and my support in english, but I'm agree with a phrase that you posted: don't give up…ever!
    I love your blog and I started to follow on your Fb page!

    a big kiss,
    Hilary
    Hilary De Luca Photographer ~ Life behind a Lens

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    1. Thank you so much Hilary... you are my 100th follower on FB... YAY :-)

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  35. Thank you Amanda and you are welcome ;-)

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  36. Love to read your articles! :)
    You are an amazing person.

    xoxo
    www.its-dash.com

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    1. Thank you so very much Dascha... you are so sweet to say that...xox :-)

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  37. hey, thanks for commenting on my blog, Launna :-) yeah, the design of the skirt is really lovely :-) havent seen it before either

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  38. I just stumbled upon your blog and I loved reading this post. You write honestly and I like that. My blog is not personal, but I always enjoy to be personal through comments and I totally understand how it can feel to be so out of the loop with answers. The universe is always balanced and whenever I have nothing or am so out of sorts, I always say out loud whatever it is I need or want. If I need to have something come to me, I say it and if I want something, I say I will get it out loud to the universe. Hope all works out for you dear and hope you will get a chance to stop by and visit me soon! :)
    xx Easy Outfits, by Pip

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    1. Thank you Pip, what a lovely comment ;-) Of course I will visit your blog :-)

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  39. Awww I'm sorry there seems to be so many things going on for you right now. Blogging is so therapeutic for you, I'm sure. Keep it up. You are bein heard and being thought of.

    www.lesley-kim.com

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  40. Replies
    1. Thank you Elisa, sometimes silence is deafening... :-/

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  41. I respect your strength and positivity. It sure can be so though, it's been a particularly challenging year for me. Keep going, we are all wishing you the best. Also, Valentina is the most gorgeous name ever!

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    1. Thank you Imogen... I wish you the best too...I love the name Valentina too ;-)

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  42. THanks for your comments sweetie! I followed you back everywhere too dear! Have a lovely day!
    xx Easy Outfits, by Pip

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  43. Aw, I'm sorry to hear you're struggling a bit :-( I know from experience how much that can affect how you feel and sleep, so I hope you get everything sorted out soon. In the end all the pieces of the puzzle will fall in place, you have to trust on that.

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    1. Thank you Kiss and make up.... I have to learn to trust more ;-)

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  44. Really great inspiration - difficult times in life, as hard as they may be, make us sooo strong! I expierenced that by mself lately - I've grown much stronger out of my pain! Tell me if you would like to follow each other, would love to hear from you - Lots of Love, Kyra♡
    www.kyras.de

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    1. Thank you Kyra, I will definitely visit and follow your blog ;-)

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  45. Hi sweet Launna!
    I follow you on bloglovin, facebook and G+.
    It's a pleasure for me.
    Kisses
    The Indian Savage Diary

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  46. Hang in there! And remember -- it is your journey -- only you can drive!

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    Replies
    1. Awe.... ty you Kc... it's hard to see the big picture sometimes :-/

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  47. Deseo que todos los cambios sean para bien.
    Acabo de descubrir tu blog y me gusta, pásate si tienes un ratito por el mio y si te gusta nos seguimos, bss.
    http://atentamente-carmen.blogspot.com.es/

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  48. the first quote beautiful! nice post dear
    check my blog if you want too:)
    NEW POST -> tr3ndygirl.com

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  49. Kiss, kiss my dear Launna..... Have a lovely day doll!
    http://expressyourselfbypaolalauretano.blogspot.it

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  50. That sounds like a good plan lovely Launna. You are magical and you'll find your magic half in the right time :)...I am sure of it.

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    1. Thank you Petronela, I am touched you believe in me so much ;-)

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  51. great post. i agree you sounds like a good plan
    www.sandicious.blogspot.com

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  52. I know it's cliche to say, but ALL of these things you have been going through are happening for a reason and are making you stronger each day. Go back and read some of your old posts and you will see the transformation. XO

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    1. Thank you Marcia, I do believe I have grown, I have reread many of the old posts too... It's too bad with all that I have gained... I have lost something really important. .....

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I love and appreciate all genuine comments, to save a little time, I won't be commenting on the comments on my blog (unless you don't have a blog), I will just visit your blog and comment there, if you have left a meaningful comment for me... I would much rather spend the time reading and commenting on a few extra blogs ❤