I Want It All

I was on a blog break, I haven't written anything... I have been good and going to bed by 9:30 or 10:00 at the latest.  No I am not sleeping with less interruptions but I am resting my body as much as possible.

I have had a lot of time to think, which is both good and difficult.  I get to ask myself the really hard questions, one of them being that I may never know the answers I am seeking... I have such a hard time understanding how something could be one way and in a flash it changes 180 degrees... it's almost like time was erased.

I am trying to date again, I just don't understand where the good and kind men are.  I keep attracting men that are so the opposite of what I want. I had someone tell me recently that I have too many tests a guy would have to pass.  I don't think I am putting tests out there for anyone but I need to know that the guy can carry on a conversation about important and funny things.  I need to feel a spark, that is what is most important to me... it's not even that I think being in a committed relationship would complete me... I am complete all my by myself.
It is that I long for that close relationship with someone, the one where I can just be myself. I want that kind of person who I can tell them anything and they can feel comfortable doing the same with me.  Someone non-judgmental, someone who can understand that I have come through a great deal in my life and I have gone down roads that were not always good for me but I always turned myself around.

I have been thinking about how I never valued myself enough because every warning was there and I refused to see it because I didn't want to see it that way.  I wanted to be right, all the little hmm thoughts... they all make sense after the fact. I now know that I value myself because if a man cannot excite me with some good conversation and with a little humor thrown it, he will never make it past that stage.  I couldn't spend my life talking about mundane things that don't matter.
I sometimes think I want too much but then I think, I'm worth it.  I definitely don't deserve to have some guy who cannot connect a sentence together or talk about sports all the time. I am willing to bring everything to the table in a relationship, holding back is what makes it fail.  Both people have to come to the relationship with that frame of mind.  Relationships are tough, there are going to be times where you will wonder what you saw in that person but the good and funny times will get you through.

Today I would never settle for any relationship that I did in the past... I didn't raise the bar high enough.  I lowered it because I thought I couldn't do better... that has changed... now if I could just find that guy I can banter with... travel with... share my dreams with... Love... I want it all.
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93 comments :

  1. Thanks for stopping by and saying hello! I've been rather absentminded from the blogging world myself lately so have been horrible at keeping up with my faves. Love your last quote. Be sure to keep taking care of yourself. Hopefully someone will come along and see you and love you wholly for you. Everyone should have someone like that in their life.

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  2. You are so right Launna you deserve to find the right understanding type of guy for you and never settle for anything less. I am so glad you made a blog post. I hope you are getting your sleep and feeling better.
    xoxoxo
    Your friend Simera
    Beautetude

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  3. Being with the wrong person is worse than being alone until you find the right person. I am sure you will find someone who is worthy of your love. He won't mind the tests, because he will want to prove himself to you. If he wants you to lower the bar then he does not respect your needs. I think someone who loves someone will strive to meet your needs, bypass them, because they will know you are worth the effort.
    Of course this is coming from a high maintanence guy ;)

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  4. Relationships are hard. You have to find the one person that is just right for you.

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  5. Launna querida boa noite tenha uma semana maravilhosa
    esta com saudade, post lindo eu amo da uma passadinha no seu blog
    Blog: http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br
    Canal de youtube: http://www.youtube.com/NekitaReis

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  6. And you deserve it all! I had a list too. Don't sacrifice and don't settle. Because whomever you let into your life you are also letting into your daughter's. Be bold as you have been and be the bright star that you are. There is a man that God is preparing for you and her. All your dreams and desires. You've had a rough road through marriage and dating. Keep the faith.

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  7. I totally agree wth you on this one. Wait until the person you want to be with comes along. If it takes a year or two and you have the rest if your lives together it will be worth it.

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  8. Launna, so glad you're back! We all need breaks sometimes :)
    And please don't worry, you will find someone who is just right for you. It may not be the easiest thing to do, but that is because relationships are hard. But you will find someone who is understanding and kind and will make a good difference in your life..you certainly deserve a person like that.

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  9. Launna it's great that you came back. I would say you should wait for your right man if he is not still here. You deserve great man with big heart as you are and no matter how long you will wait for ( I mean of course the faster the better) but I believe that God exactly now doing this work and looking for right man for You! Just we want to have it immediately but events happens in such way that we should wait for right moment in our life. Everything what we get is for good. And maybe now is time to think ( I know that you think a lot) or just maybe to prepare something, for example save money for overseas journey to India to get spirits or something else. God's action are now visible for us but he holds us on his hands when we need:)))
    I was for almost 10 years without right man in my life and I know it was right time for me to change myself and be ready to meet him, now we are together and I think it was worth to wait for such long time.
    I wish you harmony with you and your spirits and I believe everything will be ok, there is no other way !

    http://lavenderloafers.com
    I missed you too:)))) ad happy that you came back:))))

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  10. Hello Launna:

    To have someone in your life who is at one with you, someone who you can trust absolutely, someone with whom you can share both the good and the bad times and, most importantly, someone who loves you for who and what you are is, we believe, one of the greatest blessings in life. We are certain that that person will come along - you must simply be very patient which is never easy when one is wanting something to happen.

    Take care.

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  11. Love your Letter about Relationships ,some great Words!

    Have a amazing Day Launna ,kisses and lovely Hugs <3

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  12. Launna! I pray to god for brings you the right man:). It took me such a long road to find my today lovely husband. I really do know how you feels when we need someone to love.. My grand mom had told me as an old school way, she said do not expected too much, when you found someone that you really clicked then give it all of your and see if he give it all of his, if he doesn't then he isn't going to be the right one. I should have wrote and share my love story with you guys. all we need is love. May the right charming is on the way to you soon Launna. You so deserve him, you're wonderful woman. welcome back and happy to see you again. oxoxox:).

    http://www.attraction2fashion.com

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  13. The wrong person weighs you down so so so much and in so many ways. I think any relationship, even a great one can be difficult at times, no way you want to weather that with the wrong guy. Mr. Right for you is def. worth the wait! Glad you had a nice break! It's nice too that you got a bit of sleep, even if it's not back to perfect yet. :)

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  14. Thanks for stopping by! You are so right Launna you deserve to find the right understanding type of guy for you and never settle for anything less. :)

    http://thesmallnoble.blogspot.de/

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  15. Don't worry darling, you will find the right man for you... I'm sure!!!!
    You are a wonderful woman, good Luck my dear Launna!!!!
    Kisses

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  16. Sometimes if we don't find the right partner we need to be alone without boyfriends, because all around hurts. You ask but you give at the same time. A lot of hugs. Thank you very much for your comment. <3

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  17. Glad to have you back, Launna! And I agree, you're worth having it all. Don't ever think you expect too much from a man or from a relationship. My best advice would probably be to stop looking too hard, and to just let the right guy find you.

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  18. great to hear from you sweety!
    don't give up my dear! the right guy will find you soon!
    happy day!

    <3
    http://www.getcarriedaway.net/

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  19. I don't think you're being too picky at all Launna. You should never settle for less than what you deserve. I know too many people who do that and are then relegated to a lifetime of unhappiness. You have too much love to offer!! Never settle for less than someone who can offer you the same love in return.

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  20. Welcome back - nothing like time off to clear the cobwebs a little. Glad you got some rest but sure wish you got more sleep :-( I was hoping that turning your brain off from writing was going to help.

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  21. Sometimes relationships sneak up on you. I think if you proceed with an open heart, someone will find you.

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  22. Launna, I missed your posts so I am glad to see that you slowly getting back into blogging again. I really hope you will find your perfect guy, once you do I guess you will just know…

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  23. Aquele blush fica lindo na minha pele!

    Estava com saudades dos seus comentários, Launna!

    O problema para dormir está relacionado ao coração? Bom, de qualquer jeito deixo a minha dica: Não fique pensando nisso. Amores aparecem nos momentos em que menos esperamos.

    Ótima terça!

    Beijo! ^^

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  24. I'm happy you are back! The right guy will come,but don't settle for anything less.
    effortlesslady.blogspot.ca

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  25. Glad to see your back to blogging!! Good for you for taking time to yourself... sleep or resting is so important! (I always tell Tyler sleeping is my favorite hobby haha)
    www.amemoryofus.blogspot.com

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  26. Glad you feel ready to start blogging again! The best thing you said in this post is "Today I would never settle for any relationship that I did in the past" - DO NOT SETTLE! You deserve what you want and the happiness that comes with it. Rich and I celebrate 9 years of marriage tomorrow after dating for almost 18 years first. You HAVE to enjoy the person you spend your time with and they HAVE to be able to make you laugh and carry on a conversation. They have to agree with all your opinions they just have to be smart enough to HAVE an opinion! Patience! Hugs!

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  27. I had someone tell me recently that I have too many tests a guy would have to pass.
    That is the most stupid shite men can say. Just because you are not going stay still like a doll, be a mindless puppet and let him use you like a 'free prostitute' doesn't mean it's your fault.

    My Mother is not from the western(and christian) World, and she says that the non-religious way of dating and 'copulating' before marriage has made the women far more inferior in most mens eyes, instead of giving women their desired freedom. And even though I am Agnostic, I agree with her.
    We are just as much slaves to men as are muslim women wearing a Burka...

    You search for the right one... it will pay off in the long run, don't you think!? ;)

    Follow the Royal Peach

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  28. oh, i also have the problem that i only attract men that i don't want. but i think you can find a man who is kind and loving. there's someone for everybody and i think it's great that you try to date again. that's a great step into a good life but the quote picture above also states the truth: you don't need someone to complete you, you simply need somebody who accepts you completely. i haven't found someone like that either. but we should never give up. it's also great to read that you go to bed earlier. it's good to get rest, or try to get more rest. i'm wishing you a wonderful rest of the week. have a great time and all the best <3

    btw i will try to answer your mail soon.

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  29. I am glad that you are back! It missed reading your posts and hearing your opinion!
    Yes. You are right dear! You deserve a good men who understands you! It is so hard
    to find to right men. But I know that you will find him! You are great from the inside
    and outside! Everyone sees that! :-)

    xoxo
    www.its-dash.com

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  30. So glad to have you back, Launna! It's good to know that you're still taking time to rest. I really hope you meet the man you're waiting for! So many people can't distance themselves from a non-worthy relationship, at least your healthy idea of a new relationship is very clear and strong, and it'll guide you to the right person. :)
    PS I must say I really liked the phrase of the second image :)

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  31. Hi Launna,

    I'm so glad to see you back to blogging. You are right.. You are worth it... And sometimes, it's good to hold out for what you want... I'm glad to hear that you are at least getting into some sleeping schedule :)

    www.lesley-kim.com

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  32. Launna, wishing you a great today!!!!
    I think I also need to buy more white tee and you are right it's never enough:)))) xoxo

    http://lavenderloafers.com

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  33. Those quotes are really true and inspiring.
    You will definitely find the right one someday :)

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  34. Nice to know that you are back. Have wonderful life always... I am fine :D

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  35. It´s always good to have a break to stop and tnink. but it´s great to read you again in the blog. Kisses, my friend

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  36. Amiga bom dia tenha esses deia maravilhoso com muito sucesso.
    Blog: http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br
    Canal de youtube: http://www.youtube.com/NekitaReis

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  37. Hello Launna!
    I think that you will find someone, it's just that they don't appear when we want and when we don't want there are usually plenty of men that want with us.
    Hugs. Have a great day pretty

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  38. Hi Launna,

    I'm more than optimistic that you'll find the right guy one day, just stay positive! :)

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  39. Hey beauty love ur new post .Keep posting .
    Regards from Bosnia ♥
    http://obsessionwithfashion.blogspot.com/

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  40. This is an amazing and very open post! I so know what you're talking about, I mean all of it. I went down those roads, too.
    It's already an amazing thing that you're completing yourself, most people don't. You should be very proud of that! And never ever should you settle for any less than what makes you happy. It'll come your way, don't stop believing in it. I know how frustrating dating can be, but when you least expect it the one that loves you for who you are, that you can be completely yourself with will cross your path :)

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  41. And you shouldn't settle for less. You'll find the right guy, if you keep searching and keep your eyes open. I think it's harder later in life, when people are really established in their ways, but Mom dated for about 4 years before she found a great guy. It does happen. Patience and persistence, eh?

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  42. I perfectly know what you mean. You are so sincere. I was married once and now I'm married again with another men and be sure I took my time to chose better. It worth the pain so be patient...
    kss a lot
    new post: http://tupersonalshopperviajero.blogspot.com.es/2014/05/trying-out-cosmetics-a5-farmacia.html

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  43. Ugh. I had to date when I was in my late 30s and, I have to say, it was not easy. Everyone's so set in their ways. I'd say find a way to have fun with it and don't rush...find good friends to do things with. I was so glad to find someone, I'll never take it for granted again!

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  44. Amiga bom dia tenha um dia maravilhoso e abençoado
    Blog: http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br
    Canal de youtube: http://www.youtube.com/NekitaReis

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  45. i don't think you attract the men you don't want, i think there are just a lot of people that don't fit with us by nature because we all grew up win different environment and get stimulated by different things. Don't give up :) when the time comes it will happen, I know it! (from binge-dating for 2 years myself lol)

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  46. Thanks for such a lovely dropped by Launna. I started with you first. Hoping the once you are dating is the prince charming for you. Amen. Thanks again for the beautiful comment my lovely lady! I also hope you will be able to get some sleep:). Have a lovely day Launna. oxoxox.

    http://www.attraction2fashion.com

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  47. dont worry, just keep your head up. Finding your other half is hard but they do happen.

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  48. I had noticed you'd been on a break and I hope you start getting more rest and feeling a little better. Also, I know it sounds so cliché, but when you least expect to meet someone, that's when you'll meet a nice kind guy. Keep staying positive and I hope you have a great weekend…and sleep. :)

    xoDale
    www.savvyspice.com

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  49. I totally agree with your sentiments Launna, be with a man who makes you laugh everyday, not with a man who makes you cry everyday. When you find a guy that listens, makes you laugh, let's you be yourself, who can be your bestfriend and your lover..Keep Him and never let him go!!! Have a great weekend gorgeous!! xoxo

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  50. That is a really nice quote you have on the bottom.

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  51. don't worry Launna, you are so a beautiful person.... you will find your other half...
    have a nice day
    unconventionalsecrets.blogspot.it

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  52. Never give up, still believing ♥

    Feel free to visit my blog ;-)
    http://electricblooming.blogspot.fr/2014/04/ecrin-de-parfum.html

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  53. Wow! You have done a fantastic job this time!
    I am mesmerized by this post! Love it!
    You do not know how glad I am that I came here! Big hugs!

    I published 30 ideas for hair accessories (ornaments)- maybe you'll find something for yourself? :-)



    Regards,
    Katherine Unique


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  54. Amiga tenha final de semana maravilhoso
    Blog: http://arrasandonobatomvermelho.blogspot.com.br
    Canal de youtube: http://www.youtube.com/NekitaReis

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  55. Such an inspiring post sweetie! You have such a kind heart! <3

    Diana
    www.ManhattanImageandStyle.com
    New Blog Post: [Beauty & Style] .5 Ways To Instantly Improve Your Look.
    Previews Blog Post: [Outfit Idea] .A Colorful Scarf.

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  56. And you should never settle for anything less.

    I hope you have a wonderful weekend. Happy Mothers' Day!

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  57. Hi Launna,

    I was glad to hear from you this week and I so understand your break. I keep taking them too. Lately I need rest and more time with my son and that is more important to me. I have caught up with the sleep and think I can manage my time better to blog again. So, I understand where you are with men. I have been there and I was where you are right before I met my husband. Do you want to know my secret to finding him? I prayed one night and told out loud to the universe what exactly I wanted in my perfect man down to his height, hair color and build and of course put it out there, all I wanted was for this perfect man to just love the crap out of me. You will get what you want in time and hopefully the sooner the better. It's great to have a companion to go through life with and of course for that person to totally accept you for everything. I hope you have a great weekend and hope that the weather will be great for you! The sun and warmer days have been making me feel great lately! xoxo
    xx Easy Outfits, by Pip

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  58. Hi Launna! I'm behind at reading blogs and commenting, but I am trying to catch up now. Thank you for all your kind words on my blog. They are much appreciated. I don't think you are asking for too much or putting up too many tests. I think you just know what you want and don't want to settle for less than that. That makes perfect sense to me. :) Hope you have a nice Mother's Day!

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  59. You deserve it ALL! Never lose hope, Launna. Your day will come and the right man will see the beauty in you and all that you have to offer. XO

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  60. Sei que deve ser ruim escutar isso de todo mundo e nunca acontecer. Pode ser que você esteja fechada para conhecer novas pessoas!

    Ótimo sábado, Launna!

    Beijo! ^^

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  61. Launna I cant express how I am feeling! You are so beautiful from inside and outside and this beauty shows in your words. Darlin you deserve much more and you are woth it!! Believe me..don't lose hope. No average men deserves you so god must be sending the best one to you :-*
    You won't believe I read this post 4-5 times repeatedly...loved it so much and it reminded me of my time before falling in love! And Launna, you desreve the most loving and exactly same kind of men you want..when its the question of your life you should not settle down for one you can't carry on with! Love you honey..big hug <3

    Happy weekend!
    Charu
    http://www.myglossyaffair.com/

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  62. so glad that you've raised the bar Launna. You so deserve the best, not the least. You're fight to live your best life always inspires me. Hugs and happy weekend. Also happy mother's day.

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  63. very nice phrase Launna
    so sweet
    I posted a new review, I'd love to know your opinion
    would you like to pass from my blog?
    kiss

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  64. Hello Launna, me and my sister have started a new blog! I would love it if we can follow each other there also! Do visit and let me know where you follow and I will follow back right away!! :)

    Charu
    http://www.myfashionfootprints.com/

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  65. the second quote is so true!♥ and you definitely deserve an intelligent man with good sense of humor!:) It's so important to find somebody with the same approach to life!:)

    www.Lorietta.cz

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  66. Stopping by to give you a good night kiss. Sleep well and sweet dream my pretty woman. ox.

    http://www.attraction2fashion.com

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  67. Because of your comment on my blog... I don't know if every public library does offer this, but it should be written on their website's FAQ most of the time. (Imho, every library should do it, it's 2014 after all) :)

    Thank you for the comment, always love to have you over for a word or two. :) And have a lovely weekend.

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  68. It's great to have you back because I sure missed your posts. I honestly don't think you're asking for too much. You're being very reasonable and you do deserve this. You are one of the kindest people I've ever known. Keep learning and stay beautiful.

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  69. Sometimes I eat chocolate and I don't eat another things, it's what my body asks me and my soul. Hugs!! Have a great sunday!

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  70. I understood by reading your post for the blog break! Have a good day!

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  71. Happy Mother's Day, Launna!
    xoxo, Pip

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  72. Hi Launna. I'm just swinging over to wish you a Happy Mother's Day!!

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  73. you are, as always, so inspiring! Have a great Monday. :)



    I AM ALSO ON: Instagram @kennydaily, Bloglovin and Facebook (i follow back, just let me know your links)


    xoxo;
    What Kenny Hearts a Lifestyle Blog

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  74. Stopping by to wish you A Happy Mother's Day Launna. You loved.

    http://www.attraction2fashion.com

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  75. I wish and pray that you will find your right person soon <3
    www.ilovly.blogspot.com

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  76. Valeu mesmo! Aquele esmalte virou um dos meus queridinhos! *.*

    Ótimo resto de domingo pra você, Launna!

    Beijo! ^^

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  77. thank you for your comment my sweetye,have a nice evening
    unconventionalsecrets.blogspot.it

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  78. I'm new to your blog and love it. I found Mr. Right 19 years ago and here's how I did it. I figured out the type man I wanted! I accidentally read the book 'The Bridges of Madison County' (the movie sucks, read the book) and it hit me that I wanted a man like that. One that would love me with all his heart. I had spent my life loving men with all of my heart thinking that was enough. Once I knew the type man I truly wanted, he was there within a few weeks. Honest. Find an example of the type man you really want in your life (like Robert in The Bridges of M County was for me) and start comparing the guys you've dated to see where you've been going wrong. Your subconscious mind will find Mr. Right for you as soon as you know exactly Mr. Right is like.

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I love and appreciate all genuine comments, to save a little time, I won't be commenting on the comments on my blog (unless you don't have a blog), I will just visit your blog and comment there, if you have left a meaningful comment for me... I would much rather spend the time reading and commenting on a few extra blogs ❤