After I wrote the post about my mother it had me thinking about childhood incidents I had with her and while I lived with her. When we lived with her in Grimsby Ontario, she had me start out in a little school that I remember learning how to get sap from a tree and we made syrup... a nice memory.
I also remember a time where I wrote my name all over the walls and then blamed my sister Shelly, haha. Of course my mother saw through that and I had to wash the walls. There was no spanking, no name calling, no degradation... just punishment that fit the crime, I never wrote on the walls again, I learned my lesson.
My memories of my childhood are fleeting... especially when I lived with my mom before the age of six. I am glad my mom shaped me to be who I am today, I had enough of a strong foundation for who I was so that no matter how difficult my ex step mother Ruth tried to make it for me, I remembered somewhere inside that I was loved and wanted at one time.
One of the most freeing times in my life came when I was 15, nearly 16 years old... it was when my father finally left Ruth and he and my mother rekindled their relationship. I was finally able to show emotions, say how I felt without fear of being spanked or screamed at that I was basically nothing. My mother took all my anger in stride, she never raised her voice or belittled me, she was there for me.
When we decided to move to Niagara Falls as a family so that Dad could find Ruth's ex husband Murray that she had claimed was dead. He wasn't so my father needed to find him so he could annul the marriage to Ruth. My mother became a stay at home mom and she always made a great breakfast for us in the morning to get us off to school. She always did my hair, in pony's, braids.... all with different variations... I loved that time with her in the morning.
Then we would come home for supper and it was always cooking on the stove. We didn't have a TV and we didn't miss it, we always sat in the kitchen, listening to music... talking, playing scrabble. She spent numerous hours helping me with school, I went from a student who barley passed grade ten to the honor roll. I excelled with my mother being there for me... Unfortunately for me, my parents decided to go to Oregon for the summer I turned 17 and I didn't want to go. I wanted to go home to Halifax, if they had not gone to Oregon, I would have had a much different life.
Something I neglected to mention was what an incredible artist my mother was, below is photo of a huge portrait that she did for my grandmother that has three stages for my dad and my sisters. She was beyond talented and unfortunately never really did a lot with it... Also she could sew and I mean really sew, she made tuxedos and bridal gowns. She could take a pattern and make it her own by changing things, everything looked very professional.
I visited my mother for a few summers over the years and one of my most treasured times with her was when my sister Darlene made it possible for me to go to Oregon for a visit in the summer of 1995. I was able to meet all my sisters on the west coast and I was able to spend long weekends with my mother. She treated me like a princess, cooked my favorite meals, watched movies, played scrabble and talked.
My mom and I had played endless games of Scrabble over the years and not once did I beat her but we had so much fun and we talked about everything. I miss those times, where I used to listen to all her stories of how she grew up and what she had been doing while we were separated. Keeping in touch was so hard back then, it is not like it is today... When I think about my mom ... I still have questions that were never answered but I have some really treasured times with her, I felt loved, I felt safe.
I cherish my past, I accept my present and I dream for my future ♥