At least that is how I see it from my eyes when I am filled with fear, I FINALLY took a leap instead of a step an honestly it was the best leap I ever took... My fear was just that a fear, I turned away from it last night and I gained a lot of strength today knowing I was being held back because of my thoughts. Those thoughts are so overpowering... once I saw that the fear was nothing more than my thoughts... I turned away from them and I became honest with myself and with the people close to me.
All because I thought it was better not to know... now instead of berating myself over not dealing with it head on, I am grateful that I finally took the plunge. I was wrong, I like that I was wrong here... it doesn't matter to me how long it took for me to get here... it only matters that I arrived here. I am sure I will have ups and downs... that is a part of life. what is very important about this one is that regardless of what happens down the road, I know the truth and nothing can change that... that makes me smile.
What finally got me to this point? Two young women who are fighting anorexia... they both commented on my blog and when I read their stories, I saw myself in them, minus the anorexia (my eating is the opposite... over eating). Regardless, I realized that I was using food and other substitutes to handle getting through the day... but I wasn't handling, I was just getting through... These two young women are incredible and they both inspired me, so much so that I was able to see a light in my darkness. I am praying for these two women that they will see the light too... They are two very strong people as well as gifted writers, they have a no hold back type blog (the best kind as far as I am concerned).
I cherish my past, I accept my present and I dream for my future ♥