Last night when I got home from work I caught up on all my blogs and then I was going to write but I was so exhausted that I decided to lay down, well that little nap turned into a full night sleep. My body does get wiped out occasionally, I push it a lot lately. Between waking it up at 4:00 or 4:30 am from Monday to Friday and then making it walk at least 2 miles every morning... by Friday night my body has had enough and makes the decision to rejuvenate itself by making me get some sleep.. hence why I rarely wake up to an alarm on Saturday mornings.
I do get up at a better time on Saturday, I used to sleep until almost noon but I don't like wasting my whole day off, especially when it is so beautiful outside. I am grateful for all my life changes and for how good all of them are making me feel. I have more energy than I thought I would ever have, I am able to walk for great periods of time without pain or exhaustion. I am seeing the results in my body becoming more and more toned each week and I am seeing it on the scales. Yesterday was weigh in day and I have to admit I was nervous... I know the weight is going to take time to come off, especially since I am almost 50, there are no quick solutions... so I am trying to be realistic about the weight loss.
2.8 pounds, so that is now a total of 17.8 pounds in four weeks and I have to say it feels wonderful. I even went out and bought a measuring tape after work and finally took my measurements. I will be taking them twice a month, it would have been nice to have them from the beginning but that's okay, I am starting here now.
I have people telling me that I need to treat myself from time to time... however; I don't think I am depriving myself, so I don't feel the need to treat myself. Not that I won't ever eat what people consider 'a treat' again as that would be totally unrealistic but for now I want my body to only eat extremely healthy food. My idea of a treat is having a small non fat frozen yogurt from Yogen Fruz... it has 100 calories and it tastes divine. I don't feel the need to eat fried foods, chocolate or chips... I want my body to get used to the good food and then have a 'treat' on occasion as it was meant to be. This is a decision for myself and for my family... it isn't something I think everyone has to live by. This decision is a personal one.
Anyhow, a funny story... I always say good night to my David by texting him... well last night I woke up around 11:30 or so and decided to send him a quick goodnight before I drifted off again... well, I woke up and looked down at my text that I had sent and it said Love you... lol... Okay, I do love him but I don't usually text that to him because we are best friends now... I then sent another quick one to say I actually meant to say goodnight and talk to you soon... Apparently I should never send a text when I am drifting off to sleep, as what is in my heart comes out in the text... Note to myself, only text when I am wide awake going forward.
My David probably didn't know what to think... I rarely say how I feel to him as he has moved on even if my heart has not. I recognize and understand that he has moved on... apparently my heart does not. So when I am as exhausted as I was last night, everything spills out and I am not clearly awake enough to keep those thoughts and feelings to myself. I guess my heart takes over from time to time and finds a way to let my feelings out whether I like it or not...
I cherish my past, I accept my present and I dream for my future ♥