The only thing that matters now is my mission. Nothing will stand in the way anymore.
I read this quote above about changing my cants into cans on someone's Facebook yesterday and it spoke to me... The girl/woman that had it on her wall, used to be quite heavy and was in a very unhappy marriage... She gained the strength to leave her husband and then she changed her life by making the time to exercise and eat healthy... basically she loved herself enough to not stay in that situation. She inspires me daily as I see how she keeps exercising to maintain her new weight... she also states that she will never be model skinny and she is quite happy with that but that girl is so healthy and fit.
I am grateful for all the strong women that I know, women that have risen above their situations to show me that I do not have to live with the past... I have surrounded myself with women who changed their circumstances and never looked back. My absolute favorite thing about them is that not one of them says poor me, look what I have had to endure to get to where I am today... I know their stories well but that is not where they live... they live in the present... it is where I try to live everyday.
It's not like they just said, okay... that nasty, awful thing happened to me... I forgive the people who did it to me and I forgive myself for putting up with it... they had to go through some soul searching but they did not wallow in it... I love that strength they had and have... I came through some terrible things myself but that is not who I am anymore... I am making better choices for myself, I am living in the present and mainly I have forgiven the people that hurt me... I honestly forgive them and I feel for them... just how sad is their life that they had to hurt me to try to feel better. I am hoping and praying always that those people move through their pain and forgive themselves and become the best person they can be... I think until I could do that, I could not move on...
I changed my cants into cans and my dreams into plans. I just started one day, instead of making an excuse to start another day, I got up and started that day. Was it easy? No way... it was hard... my first walk was insane, I was blood red, so sweaty and hot... it was for a matter of 15-20 minutes. I had to stop twice to catch my breath. What did I do? I got out and did it the next day ... was it simple the next day? No... it was hard, each day was an effort and it continues to be an effort but I make it an effort now... I am not happy with just doing what I did the day before, I want it to be harder.
I want to push myself, I remember reading people's blogs like Joy's and Janice's and thinking WOW, how do these ladies do this, I could never do that... I am not that committed... well... I am now and if I am committed... then anyone can be... I want to do all those amazing things that they do and I will because I have made a choice to do them. I am not going to sit here any longer and say I am 50, how can I do that? Well, surprise, surprise... I am doing it. When the contest at work is over the end of the month, The Biggest Loser should be starting their new season, I am going to join up on line with them and continue to get weighed in every Friday.
I have small goals, my first one is to lose the biggest percentage of weight and win the contest at work, the second is get to Christmas and hopefully be down an additional 30 pounds ... I am so looking forward to being in control of my weight and showing myself that all things are possible. Then the next thing is to get to March and be in the 100's... a huge mile stone for me as I have not been there since I was in my early 20's. The last one isn't even a weight, it is a size that I will be comfortable with and I have no idea what size that will be until I get there... Like I have said many, many times... I do NOT want to be skinny... I adore and love my curves and I plan to have them for my life. I personally don't think skinny would look good on me.
I also know very well that this will always be a struggle for me and that I will have to watch what I eat by always counting calories and always exercising... I happen to think I am worth that work and I will never look back again. I aim to show myself and others that no longer will I sit on the side lines and wonder why I cannot do what others do? I can and I will... I have changed my cants to cans and my dreams to plans.... You can too...
I cherish my past, I accept my present and I dream for my future ♥