I need to make this post about what I'm truly grateful for, not that I'm not thankful for so much in my life but lately I don't find it as easy to just go to my gratitude list as I have in the past.
I realize I'm being selfish when my life is full of blessings. I have my two daughters, my son-in-law Paul, my grandson Jackson, my health, a home to live in, plenty of food, awesome friends, the gospel, my job, my blog, I live in a free country, I can see, I can hear, I can walk, I can talk, I'm funny, I'm friendly.
Sometimes I think it would be easier to erase the past then to deal with it but deep down I know that's not true; I wouldn't be me without my past. I guess I'm just having a tough time getting to that next level.
Can I ask you all to pray or send positive and uplifting thoughts for me. I do this everyday for the people that are in my life whether you are directly in my life or in my blog. I just really need to start seeing the good again and not just for a day.
I need to somehow learn to be happy again. I was happy, really happy, for a long time. I've found it so hard to be happy for more than day here and there lately. It's because I allowed my heart to be open and now it's in pain.
I think I need to take each day and pick something I'm grateful for and dwell on it, blog about it and be thankful for it. I want being happy to be a way of life, it was at one time, it can be again.
Mostly I've learned a very hard lesson, I will never open my heart again, I'm not looking for my best friend, I found him; I'm not looking for my soul mate, I found him; I'm not looking for the love of my life, I found him. Only to lose him.
I'm am grateful for the past, present and future.
"Everything you want, also wants you" ~ Jack Canfield