Nothing Will Change That

First and foremost my David is okay, he had his surgery and came through so well; he is home... resting and relaxing as much as possible.  I am just SO happy, SO elated... I can breathe finally, I have been so focused with worry, time for me to relax now too.

So last night I was laying in bed... I couldn't sleep right away so I decided to write and I wrote the poem below.  I have realized that my biggest fear with my David was that if I told him that I still loved him that I would lose him as a friend; that could happen but I don't think that it will.  I am moving on for me and for him.



Time stands still for me
When my thoughts are in the past
I'm leaving them there today

I'm moving on, I need to do this for me and for you
The truth must be said, at all costs
I love you, I always will, nothing can change that

I've been afraid for far too long
Afraid if I said how I felt, that things would change
I don't want to be afraid anymore

I am confronting my fear here and now
Maybe I have the fear for no reason
Maybe that is the lesson I need to learn

Or it might be that I'd lose you
But you'd lose me too
And I would be a great loss

We will always be unfinished business in my heart
The door will never close
I will always be there for you

One more time, I accept the present
I'm moving on, for me and for you
I love you, I always will, nothing can change that

Before Christmas and through to New Years, I was barely holding myself together... I did it for Valentina.  I kept myself together, fearing that I would fall completely apart after New Years; I didn't fall apart, I am actually feeling my heart healing.  I am happier, I have goals that I am working towards. 

I am grateful that I found a way to change my thoughts and emotions so that I can finally write what my biggest fear was, it's no longer a fear anymore... I am at peace with whatever happens. 

"Everything you want, also wants you" ~ Jack Canfield

8 comments :

  1. I'm glad to hear that David's surgery went well. I'm also glad to hear that you have decided to move on and that you are feeling happier and at peace. It takes time to change and heal, but it is worth it.

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  2. good idea you got there
    our fears sometimes prevent us from doing what is right for us
    X)

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  3. Hello Launna:
    Of course we are so pleased to hear that everything went well for David. We wish him a very speedy recovery back to full health.

    Your poem is a wonderful expression of how you feel. We are certain that it must help to turn thoughts to words.

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  4. It does take time Daisy, I am sure I will still have my days here and there but I finally feel like I am now on the path. Thank you for your comment:)

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  5. Sayid, fears can prevent us from so much... thank you for your comment:)

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  6. Thank you for your sweet comment Jane and Lance, it does help to put my thoughts into words.

    I am ecstatic that my David is recovering:)

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  7. So glad David's surgery went well and very happy for you that you sound so good and ready to find the love that you so amazingly deserve. You have the biggest heart and really give to so many.

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  8. Thank you Joy, I will always love my David but I need to let go or I will always stay stuck....

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I love and appreciate all genuine comments, to save a little time, I won't be commenting on the comments on my blog (unless you don't have a blog), I will just visit your blog and comment there, if you have left a meaningful comment for me... I would much rather spend the time reading and commenting on a few extra blogs ❤