In about 10 days I'm going to start my 90 day cleanse, I'm actually excited to start my journey, I may keep up with the food aspect of it even longer. I don't see me going without social media longer than 90 days, I think that will be the too difficult for me. At least I'll still be blogging, I need my outlet and it will be a great way for me to keep track of my journey on the cleanse. I'm going to find what works for me on this cleanse and keep the best parts.
I'm going to be a busy girl with the cleanse, the running club and yoga. It'll be good that I don't have anything like social media interfering with my cleanse. This time next year, I want to have run a 5K and a 10K, eventually I hope to be able to run a marathon. Joy from Joy's Journal Thoughts has told me running is her time to think, I'm looking forward to that. Just being with my thoughts.
I'm not giving up people this time, that was the hardest thing I ever did. Not being able to talk to David for almost 40 days was hell, I am not putting myself through that again. I can only hope that it won't be another 40 days. I had another light bulb moment about myself tonight because David and I aren't talking right now. I realized that I have major mistrust issues, I was sure I had worked through that but instead I have been sad and in fear, this is David, he is trustworthy, if he says he is taking some time, he is taking some time. We will talk again, he's honest... why did I neglect to remember that.
I am calmer and more relaxed now, sure I am still very sad about David and I not being together but we are best friends and I never want to give that up, love is amazing and intoxicating but if you cannot be best friends, it isn't worth it. It will never last otherwise, fairy tale love is beautiful but it's not all that it takes to make a relationship last, it means being friends and working through difficult times and mostly it means trusting that person.
I have actually learned something about myself, something that will help me to understand why I have had certain behaviors over my life. I'm hoping all this time for me will help me to grow even more so that I can become the best me.
"Everything you want, also wants you" ~ Jack Canfield